Edmond Chan

Why is pride a dirty word? Let’s take our pride back

chanman · May 25, 2016 · Leave a Comment

Is anyone proud of themselves anymore?

Does anyone still have a sense of pride?

Two things happened to me recently that made me think I’d let my sense of pride slip.

I was at the train station in a cafe with Angelique.

There’s a guy who’s worked at the station for years. We say hello to each other but we’ve never really had a conversation.

This day he decides to say more.

“Young lady, you must be a very good cook!”

I can see where this is going.

“This young man used to be slim, good-looking and very well-dressed. Not anymore”, he said pointing at my belly.

“I used to say to my son, who’s at university now, look at this man. Be more like him. I don’t say that anymore.”

Ouch.

The next thing was I was visiting my dad who now lives on his own since my mum passed away 5 years ago.

There’s a fair amount of clutter there and it hasn’t had a deep clean for long time.

Throwing out unused stuff and dusting off layer upon layer was deeply satisfying.

It struck me that this is where the phrase ‘house-proud’ came from.

What’s happened to pride?

Pride used to be regarded as a positive thing, so why is it so maligned and discouraged?

Nietzsche argued that pride belonged in the Homeric aristocratic value system.

In this framework, pride was the preserve of the noblemen.

He argues that this got overthrown by the Judeo-Christian value system.

This later value system made being strong ‘evil’ and raised the status of the ‘meek’ to those who would inherit the earth.

Christianity made Pride one of the Seven Deadly Sins.

We also have the phrase: “Pride before a fall.”

So much of society now discourages pride.

What are the consequences of this?

Lack of pride manifests in:

Dirty cars

Untidy houses

Shoddy work

Unkempt appearance

Half-assed attempts at stuff

General not giving a shit

Pride manifests itself in:

Good work

Good upright posture

Strong eye contact

Attention to detail

Completion of goals

How can we take more pride?

Iron your clothes

It’s simple but there’s a world of difference between putting on a freshly pressed shirt and a wrinkled one.

You feel different.

Like you’re worth a freshly ironed shirt.

Lose excess weight

Being overly fat shows a lack of respect for your body and a lack of self-discipline.

Shave

Yes there’s a fashion for huge beards and straggly stubble at the moment.

There’s a reason that a man’s routine in the morning should be ‘Shit, shower, shave’.

It’s because it makes you feel awesome.

A really good shave makes you feel like you’ve made an effort and taken care of yourself.

Learn how to shave here:

Get a sharp haircut

The opposite of feeling groomed is being a shoddy mess.

Look like you’re ready to face the world head on.

Get a short back and sides like this guy.

Treat yourself to a regular haircut.

I get mine done in a local barber shop for around £10.

You might think that’s too cheap to for a good cut but the key is regular trimming and close shaves.

Trim your pubes

How much pride do you show in yourself when you have a bush that’s like, well a bush?

You wouldn’t like to be on the receiving end of that, would you?

So don’t inflict it on your partner.

Get a large pair of scissors and cut your pubes carefully.

You don’t need to shape them, just make them neat.

(Don’t use communal kitchen scissors to cut your pubes like a friend of mine did whilst in a flat share.)

Polish your shoes

Scuffed shoes show a man who doesn’t respect himself enough to put his best foot forward. Take the time to learn how to care for your shoes and polish them up.

Make your bed

How much pride can you have in yourself if you can’t even make your own bed in the morning? There’s a great commencement speech by Admiral William McRaven where he shares 10 life lessons. One of which was ‘Make Your Bed’. He argues that the small sense of achievement gives you momentum for the day.

Here’s his speech in full. I highly recommend watching it.

Eat better

You wouldn’t put impure fuel into your car would you? At least not knowingly.

Your body should run like a supercar. A Ferrari or a Pagani.

So why do you put fuel with questionable nutritional value into it?

Treat your body with the respect it deserves and eat the best quality food you can afford.

Don’t look average

The average man doesn’t have pride in himself.

This is clear from him wearing clothes that don’t fit him properly.

Generally, average men wear clothes that are too baggy for them.

He wears clothes that don’t stand out.

Don’t settle for average.

Aim for exceptional.

Look at Tiny Tempah.

Or Ryan Gosling.

Aim for the best.

Reclaim your pride

What do you think? Let me know in the comments below.

What I learned from The Rise of Theodore Roosevelt by Edmund Morris

chanman · May 9, 2016 · Leave a Comment

Unlike most of the books on this site, what I took from The Rise of Theodore Roosevelt isn’t so much about learning, but much more about inspiration.

Theodore (Teddy) Roosevelt led one of the most action-packed lives in history, filled with vigour, achievement, joy, suffering and overcoming.

This incredible biography of Roosevelt by Edmund Morris is heavily detailed and a work of intense scholarship but is as readable as a novel.

This is actually the first of a three part series by Morris on Roosevelt. (The second being Theodore Rex and the final being Colonel Roosevelt)

The Rise of Theodore Roosevelt charts the period from birth to the Presidency.

What can we learn from The Rise of Theodore Roosevelt?

That life is more than long enough

Most people complain that life is too short. They can’t fit everything in. There’s never enough time etc.

Teddy’s life shows that all to be bullshit. He found time to be a prolific writer and author, ranch-owner, pioneer, politician, naturalist, policeman, soldier, war hero, conservationist and President of the United States.

He would have been in full agreement with Seneca’s treatise On the Shortness of Life.

Life isn’t too short.

60 or 70 years is a lot of time.

But how most of us waste the time given to us.

How much time is wasted on pointless web-surfing, mindless TV marathons and shopping?

4 hours a day in the evening watching Netflix adds up.

Say you do this 5 times a week.

That’s 20 hours a week.

80 hours a month.

Imagine using 80 hours a month to your side projects.

To working out.

To reading more.

To doing the things you’ve always wanted to do but put it off like writing a novel, learning an instrument, learning a language.

Don’t waste time. Allocate it consciously and wisely.

That we can always change our destiny

Roosevelt was born with a weak body. His mind and spirit were bright and strong.

His father recognised this and gave young Teddy early bodybuilding equipment.

Roosevelt rose to the challenge and built up his asthmatic, frail body into a strong, muscular physique.

He then boxed, swam, wrestled, rode, throwing himself into physically demanding activities, constantly testing and developing his masculinity.

Roosevelt, through hard work and determination, turned himself into the epitome of physical vigour.

The importance of social confidence

Roosevelt was famous for his loud voice, ramrod straight posture and strong handshake.

He could walk into every room and say hello to everyone with a smile and strong eye contact.

The importance of moral courage

Roosevelt wasn’t afraid to stick to his guns and have the strength of his convictions.

He would go against his Party when their views differed from his, even under pain of censure and humiliation.

This undoubtedly helped him with winning the trust of the American public. They knew he would do what he believed to be the right thing.

The importance of physical courage

When the Spanish-American arrived, Roosevelt was Secretary of the Navy and had no need to put himself in harm’s way.

Of course, instead, Roosevelt raised a regiment known as the Rough Riders and saw action in Cuba, posthumously winning the Congressional Medal of Honour, the highest military honour in the United States.

Interstellar shows us how much more we urgently need to know about the Universe we live in

chanman · May 6, 2016 · 1 Comment

I saw Christopher Nolan’s new movie last night. It defies easy categorisation and is making early claims to being one of the greatest films I’ve ever seen.

It seamlessly blends cosmology, quantum physics and AI with fundamental questions about our humanity and about our race to destroy the planet we live on. I loved that it assumed a level of familiarity with physics that made me feel I was watching a movie that transcended any expectations of its viewing demographic.

Aside from raising uncomfortable questions about our unsustainable rate of naked and undirected consumption, what struck me most from the film was how little we really know about the Universe we live in, both from an academic perspective and more gallingly from a species perspective.

Physicists have been wrestling with unifying Relativity and Quantum Mechanics since the mid-1900s. Recent developments at CERN and the Hadron Collider have encouraged optimism that we are inching closer to answers. Surely we would reach these answers faster if more people took an interest in the fundamental questions. Why do we not care about whether superstrings are the key to a Theory of Everything? Why are we indifferent to what happens inside a black hole? Why don’t we want to know what is beyond an event horizon?

The greatest leaps forward in understanding and achievement have always occurred through massive funding (whether by wealthy patrons or the state), a collective will to succeed and an environment that is conducive to breakthroughs.

A key example of the first two conditions being satisfied was JFK’s call to action in 1960. He said that, even as the Soviets were putting Gagarin into orbit and as the US’s rockets were exploding on the launchpad, the US would put a man on the moon within a decade. Billions and billions were spent on harnessing the greatest minds and the greatest pioneering spirits to achieving this seemingly unattainable goal. Kennedy also galvanised an entire nation with the now famous exhortation that we do things not because they are easy but because they are hard. With the first two in place, the third condition was now flourishing with the necessity imposed by the Cold War and the intellectual hothouse and pioneering derring-do of NASA and the astronauts of Project Mercury.

Surely today’s quest for the answers to the unknown Universe are even more pressing than the mind-blowing feat of putting a man on the Moon. Yet the sums of money being pumped into projects such as CERN is laughably small in comparison to Project Mercury. Today, 20 member states contribute only CHF 1bn to CERN, a lot of money but not nearly as much as we should be funding. It should be 100 times that. Even in this age of austerity, we can afford much more than CHF 2.2 per person per year. Why not CHF 200?

Naysayers might ask why? And this is a fair question. Does the search for the fundamental answers have utility? Of course. But that would be to miss the point. We are enriched as a species when our sum of knowledge expands. What is the utility of us having the theory of evolution? Nothing beyond the satisfaction of understanding our world better. We are better for the theory and the desire to understand ourselves and our place within the cosmos. And that is for evolution. How much more satisfying would the answers be to the questions of where the Universe came from, what is the Universe made from, what are the laws of physics and why are they the laws that they are? The answers to these would also go some way to answering the big metaphysical questions such as what is time? What is life? And ultimately, why are we here?

What you can learn from reading Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion by Robert Cialdini

chanman · May 5, 2016 · Leave a Comment

Summary

Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion by Robert Cialdini is a towering classic of marketing and psychology.

Cialdini shows us humans are wired for mental shortcuts in reasoning.

He then shows us how marketers use this hardwiring against us consumers for their gain.

It’s not illegal and it’s not unethical but it’s definitely manipulation.

Cialdini wants us to ‘inoculate’ ourselves against these marketing tricks, and give us some defences against them.

There are 6 principles of persuasion:

(1) Reciprocation

Studies show that if someone does you a favour, you’re likely to return the favour, and often reciprocate more than you received.

Marketers use this with free samples and free trials. I was in my local supermarket recently and there was a guy offering free sushi samples next to the sushi bar. This is a classic example of an attempt to persuade me to buy some sushi.

(2) Commitment and Consistency

Cialdini says that humans have a strong compulsion to be consistent. If we commit to something, whether verbally or in writing, we have a strong compulsion to stay consistent with that commitment.

Cialdini recounts a sad story of an American POW who was persuaded to write a statement saying mildly that ‘America is not perfect’. This seemingly harmless statement became the start of his full collaboration.

We see this technique a lot. I have small charity donations taken out monthly and every now and again, a fundraiser from one of these charities will call and I will increase my monthly donation.

As this principle states, I want to remain consistent with my previous commitment, even if it costs me more.

(3) Social Proof

This is a huge factor in persuasion. When we see other people doing something, we are likely to do that too. Look at the social proof on the front cover above:

We see it’s a National Bestseller (it must be good!).

The journal of Marketing Research says, ‘For marketers, it is amongst the most important books written in the last 10 years.’ (It must be good!)

It’s a revised edition, it must have been in print for a long time and required updating (it must be good!)

We see it when we read testimonials that we trust. Think about TripAdvisor and Amazon and how we’re persuaded by products that have several hundred great reviews from real, verified purchasers. (It must be good! Look at all those reviews!)

(4) Authority

We are heavily persuaded by authority. If someone we respect says something, we are more easily persuaded than by someone we don’t respect saying exactly the same thing.

Think about Warren Buffett tipping up a stock versus your taxi driver.

Or well-known faces promoting kitchenware products.

Interestingly, we’re even persuaded by the mere tokens of authority such as a uniform or a qualification.

Again, look at the book cover above. The letters PhD give Cialdini authority in our minds even though we’ve never met him!

(5) Liking

We’re more easily persuaded by people we like. If a salesman is likeable, then we should beware of what they’re about to ask.

‘We like people who are similar to us, who compliment us, and who cooperate with us’

(6) Scarcity

When opportunities become scarce, we desire them more.

Marketers take advantage of this fact by injecting scarcity into their offers.

For example:

‘Hurry before stock runs out!’

‘This offer ends today! Don’t miss out’

To defend ourselves against this tactic, ask whether you really want the product/service on its merits or whether you’re experiencing an irrational desire to own it.

What can we learn from Cialdini’s Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion?

There’s so much to draw from this book. It’s deservedly a classic.

We can become much more savvy consumers

Recognise that we’re bombarded by advertisements and sales pitches all the time.

The marketers behind big corporate marketing drives are highly intelligent and savvy people.

They are using every tactic, principle and strategy they can get hold of.

Every salesman worth their salt is using the principles above and more as much as they can

They are likeable (or they try to be).

They offer you something for free.

They try to get you to commit to something.

They employ authority.

They definitely employ social proof.

Now that you know the principles, you can guard against it.

Think back to the last 10 things you bought, from car insurance to BBQs to mobile phones to shoes to mortgages to your house, your last holiday.

What do you remember that relates to any of the principles above?

Would you still have bought the items if these weren’t being employed?

We can use the tactics and principles to be more persuasive ourselves

Look at each of the principles again and mentally tick off what you can use to be more persuasive.

Imagine you’re a salesman or marketer who’s just been given a toolbox to try out.

How could you demonstrate social proof?

How can you be more likeable?

How can you get prospects to commit a small action so that they buy bigger down the line?

The possibilities are endless.

It reminds us that we should yield to reality and not what we wish the world to be

Many people might react to this book by exclaiming how unfair and unethical this all is.

They might say that it’s dark-side Machiavellian manipulation.

This would be the wrong way to look at this.

These principles show us that humans are wired up a certain way. This is a fact and questions about whether this is right or wrong are fairly pointless.

The best way forward is to accept and embrace this fact as reality.

This way we can protect ourselves against our shortcomings because we know about them and we can also use them to our advantage.

And what’s wrong with that?

Learn more

Buy Persuasion here.

Check out Professor Cialdini’s website here.

Why we should commit to becoming learning machines

chanman · Apr 30, 2016 · Leave a Comment

I first heard of the idea of being a learning machine from my time at Phoenix in reference to legendary billionaire investor Charlie Munger.

Simply put, a learning machine never stops learning and is committed to growth.

It’s easy to say and I bet everyone would say that they’re learning machines, but how true is this really.

The sad reality is most people don’t like to learn and aren’t committed to lifelong learning.

Most people don’t even learn at school. They’re taught facts to recite but they’re not learning.

It carries on through univrsity and once they’re in a career, the learning has stopped.

At 30 years old, most men have become average and their lives have stagnated.

Why it’s important and why you should care

The day you stop learning is the day you start moving backwards.

I want to be wiser today than I was yesterday. Even just a little bit. Overtime, these small increments build up and build up.

Imagine the power of compounding applied to small incremental improvements in learning.

Over a year. Over a decade. Over a lifetime.

Why bother?

Because otherwise, you stay average.

Why would you want to stay average?

Average means being doomed to repeat mistakes.

Never becoming wealthy.

Never reaching your goals.

Never improving your relationships.

Never taking charge of your own destiny.

Never taking responsibility for your life.

Don’t settle for average.

Commit to becoming a learning machine.

Steps to becoming a learning machine

Say it out loud:

I don’t know everything.

I don’t know very much at all.

To think that I know everything I need to know is arrogant and absurd.

I can always know more.

I can always be learning more.

Aim to know more about lots of diverse topics

Literature, finance, self-improvement, cooking, sport, health, travel, writing, marketing, art, fashion, love, cosmology, politics, economics, psychology, mythology, history, philosophy, religion, poetry. The list is endless.

Think of different and novel ways to put these topics together

Munger aims for a latticework of different mental models. How different knowledge bases can intertwine and interact, to form new knowledge.

Seek out fellow learning machines

This is hard to do. Learning machines are not common creatures. I’m lucky enough to know a few, however, even then, it’s rare still to find one who shares your interests and learning angle.

There is one surefire shortcut. Follow successful people. Successful people tend to be learning machines. Read their biographies and learn from the best.

Check out great blogs. You’ll learn more from the following non-exhaustive list than most formal educations.

Tim Ferriss

Tim’s blog is a wealth of information. He has a blog that has received millions of views. His podcast has had at the time of writing more than 60m downloads. He is insatiably curious and this will surely rub off on you.

James Altucher

Altucher writes like a dream. And he writes a lot. Everywhere. Check out his blog here.

Fighting Mediocrity

This is a YouTube channel like no other. He’s done a library’s worth of awesome animated book reviews.

Check it out here.

Join Quora and Medium

Quora is an amazing resource. People ask questions and people answer those questions. More often than not, experts in those fields will answer those questions. Subjects range from technology, coding, marketing, fashion, academia…everything.

Medium was founded by one of the founders of Twitter. He wanted to create a longer form content publishing platform. Some people use it as their blog. Articles cover a wide range of topics and the best get upvoted and pushed to the top of the discoverability rankings.

I have an account and specify the topics I’m interested in and I get a nice email of Medium Digest where articles I may want to read are highlighted.

My Medium account is medium.com/@edmondchan1000

Always carry a book

Books have never been cheaper. Pile into Amazon and get yourself a paperback.

A good friend of mine always gets his books secondhand so that they have more character but that’s totally up to you.

Get a Kindle

Ebooks are here to stay and have the obvious advantage of having a whole library in your pocket. It’s smaller and lighter than a normal paperback.

I’ve had loads of Kindles in my time but now I read using the Kindle app on my iPad and iPhone 6.

Kindles are improving all the time now as well. Check the latest models out here.

Carry a notebook

I’ve got a friend in Rome who always carries a small Moleskine to jot down thoughts he has, quotes he likes from the book he’s reading at the time.

Moleskines are quite pricey. Imitations are often just as good.